I am a hypochondriac.  It is because I don't take very good care of myself.  Therefore, as soon as something happens, I know it is my fault.  Because I let my self get fat, I have diabetes.  Because I don't wear sunscreen often enough, that zit is skin cancer, etc.  To be clear, I have not been diagnosed with either diabetes or skin cancer, but part of me feels like it is imminent... Now, exiled from my life and most of my excuses for not having the time,  I find myself in a wierd place where I am confronting my self care from a new direction.

I found myself aking myself, "Self, if you were in charge of taking care of someone else in your situation, what would you do for them?"  Healthy food and exercise were tops, of course.

I went to church yesterday and the sermon was in invitation to a holy Lent.  The preacher reminded us that Lent was our way of stepping into the Wilderness and clearing ourselves of distractions.  What things are in the way of our relationship with the divine?  What clutter can we get rid of?  What are we lacking?  I was immediately struck with my situation as a time of exile in the desert (albeit Mission Hills in Rancho Mirage, but nonetheless, exile).  Now that I have been forced out of my life, what can I do to prepare myself for returning?

Health and self-care are the initial answer.  So, I'm off for a walk in the desert. Where will it lead?